I haven't really posted here in awhile so I suppose I feel slightly obligated to do so, at least enough to keep up appearances, ha!  I have recently narrowed my studies to include some new ideas that I've come across and sound like something I would like to try.  So currently I'm doing my best to look into:  evocation, necromancy, death magic, blood magic, chaos magic, and oddly enough faerie magic (yeah, I know it seems slightly off from the rest of the list but what can I say, I like fae.).  I also should give an honorable mention to the urban primitive movement, which I have to admit I am a little interested in, but I'm going to have to look into it more before I do anything about it.  It might be interesting to note that I also have an interest in voodoo, or at least, one slight aspect of it.  As I understand it, whenever a voodoo priest(ess) helps out someone magically, they must then do something bad to someone else magically, in order to keep the balance (correct me if I'm wrong you actual practitioners out there, just try to keep away from the hate mail please).  This I find incredibly interesting, and I may just have to incorporate it into my practices later on.

There is also mutterings among a few of my friends that I'm in the works of forming a dark witch coven, or something of the like, and I can't really deny or admit to that at the moment as certain complications have arisen.  The idea was suggested to me awhile back from a close friend, and it was in the works, however the local "dark witches" that we're assosiated with may not be on the same thought process as I would be when it comes to forming something like this.  Anyways, if it ever does come about I'm sure it will be written about, and open "applications" will be accepted, haha!  Anyways, that about it for now. Do what thou wilt...

I was never raised as a young man under any sort of religious following, however my first experience with religion was in the sixth grade. I lived in an inner city neighborhood and the "safest" school was a catholic school. Now this was a new experience for me, I had no idea about the catholic faith at all, but seeing as how I had no say in the matter I went and learned. Halfway through the year, with some prompting from my mother, I was baptized into the catholic church. Soon after however I found it was not a path I wished to take and once we moved away to a new city for my Jr High schooling I chose to go to a public school instead of the local catholic one. During this time I spent much of my free time learning about new religions and their beliefs. Judaism, Christians, Catholics, Muslims, Protestants, Witchcraft, Buddhism, and Taoism to name a few. Finding that none of them held the specific beliefs I held for myself.
For the longest time I held the belief that no single religion held a "true" aspect of divinity. Not one had hit the nail on the head, which I still hold to be true, but over time and research I discovered that all of them held bits of truth to what divinity really is. Now, I don't claim to be any sort of expert or have been "touched by the divine" so I truly don't know what divinity really is and what it wants for us all. However, I know what I believe and I believe that all religions of the world have been influenced by the spark of the divine, however each interpreting it to different degrees. Lets take a look in comparison to a few.
Christians, Catholics, Jews, and Muslims. Each of them a different religion with different beliefs and ways they worship and call their God. However, what many people in these lines fail to realize is that what each sect refers to as God, Allah, and Yahweh are in fact each the same, but these people that founded these religions each had a different view on how to worship "Him" and what he wanted of them. In the beginning... or at least close to the beginning there was a man named Abraham, he and his family set out from Mesopotamia, or Iraq, to what would be now called Israel. Along his journey he sleeps with his wife's servant and she becomes pregnant and the mother and soon to be born child set off on their own path south. This would be where Islam and Judaism separate and form themselves. Later on in Israel a man named Jesus is born, his followers are the first to start the Catholic faith. From Catholicism is born Christianity and that brings us up to date.
Unfortunately I diverge from my original point. As many of us know there is a singular entity in the universe that many call "The Source" or "The One" which would be from where all life, divinity, and other entities are born. Each face of every God worshiped in existence is a singular facet of The Source, male, female, dark, light, compassionate, or vengeful. The problem that many of the followers of the old ways face is the belief that we're devil worshipers or Satanists, or that we don't believe in the "Christian" God. Unfortunately this is wrong, as we should all recognize the existence of all gods that have been worshiped, for who are we to judge who is true and who is false? The answer is simple, all are true. There is not a single Divine presence that works on this planet that is not some facet of The Source. There is no one true way for us to worship said god or goddess, whoever it may be. All that they ask of us is that we believe and give them reverence. These are the opinions I formed throughout my junior high and high school years, and as the years went on terms were tweaked and set into a way that many of us recognize today.
After high school I did what many young people do, went to college, however soon found out that I was still a dumb young man and left for personal reasons. The following years were trying times for me, I moved around a lot, jumped from job to job in a search to find myself and my place in the world. I started into a downward spiral which is where my questions were answered. I spent a few months in a homeless shelter after hitting what I would classify as my "rock bottom". I thought that my life was going no where and that my questions would never be answered. However it was during this trying time that I spent a lot of time at the local library reading books. Religion has always been at the forefront of my education and I am always eager to learn something new about a particular sect of people and their beliefs. One day I stumbled across a section of books on Paganism and Wicca. Having done a little research in my youth on Witchcraft I decided I could afford to learn more about the more religious aspect of The Craft. During the next couple weeks I read what I could only estimate would be 20 or 25 books, sometimes reading two or three at a time. Realizing soon after that this was a sect of people that held similar beliefs as I did I realized that it was something I should look into.
Soon after I realized I was hitting on something important to my studies and decided that I had to learn more. And I tell you this reader, the Source works in mysterious ways, because not 3 days after deciding to take this path that I met a group of individuals who I had been friends with for quite some time who ran a study group for The Craft. Soon after I was accepted into the group and started my involved learning of what we know as Wicca. During this time I continued to read books and learn different ideas and opinions on The Craft, while getting into more detail during my study sessions. Over time I decided upon following the path of Asatru, while mixing in another type called Nocturnal Witchcraft. During this time I was given the name of Loki by my teacher who I claim now as a mother. At my first midsummer rite I was dedicated to the Gods and since then have learned much from them and have seen many things that I never would have imagined. I have had a terrifying encounter with a malevolent spirit who attacked me. I descended into the Underworld and had my life flashed in front of my eyes in the presence of a God and Goddess and then was shown the beginning of the Underworld. I feel honored to have been shown these things and they have changed who I am as a person.
Ahead of me there are many unseen experiences, I hope to one day descend further into the Underworld and be given permission to use a specific type of divination that many would consider dangerous and unethical. However, is the search for knowledge truly unethical? I would say no, it is our goal in life to learn as much as possible, and to experience as much as we can in order to grow closer to divinity.
The problem I come across is that in this religion many of us choose to classify ourselves into one particular sect. Whether it be Celtic, Alexandrian, Dianic, Asatru and so on. However what we forget is that in The Craft each is an individual. We do not look to a priest or priestess to be our link to the Divine, each of us is our own link to the divine. We all chose are own way of practicing, times we worship, where we worship, and so on. Why do we feel the need to classify ourselves into one set group? What many of us may forget is that in the end we're all wanting the same thing. So why do the different groups choose to have problems with others? Some believe that no males should be allowed in circles, some believe that one cannot become a "Wiccan" unless they have been taught by their grandmother, who was taught by her grandmother, and so on and so forth back to the beginning. Can each of us not stand up as one and simply proclaim to the world "You are my brother, you are my sister. We are all one, and we all individuals. I respect how you choose to worship, as you respect mine. Your god/dess is no better or worse than mine. There is no right or wrong way to worship them, all are right as long as you do not force your ways upon me."
Do I choose to classify myself as a Wiccan, Witch, Pagan/Heathen, or the countless other terms there are? No, I do not choose to classify myself into one sect. Some choose to call this eclectic, however I would rather refer to myself as a seeker. I don't know where life will lead me years from now. For all I know I could be walking into a Mosque, or a Synagogue, or studying the Quaballa. At that time will I call myself a Muslim, Jew, or a Heathen? No, for I know that in the end all leads back to The Source, The One, the "Great Architect" of the universe as some refer to it. My personal goal in life is to learn as much as possible about Divinity. Will my opinions on the subject change in the future? Of course they will, I will evolve as all of you will during your life. However my views may be broader than the average person, but that is my choice. Because in my opinion if I leave this world, with only truly knowing 1% of Divinity, then I will feel I have accomplished something great. And in my personal opinion the only way to truly get close to Divinity is to learn as much about it's different aspects as possible.
My call to you reader is this: Spend some time attending a local Church or Synagogue service, speak with different kind hearted religious leaders in your community. I'm not telling you to diverge from your chosen path or tradition. I'm simply asking you to take some free time you have and learn different aspects of Divinity. You may find, as I did, that each one holds truth in their texts and teachings. You may find common ground, you may find true friends where you may think you would never find them. And in doing this you may be able to break down barriers of prejudice that no one has tried to. In the end this is the best way to serve our own communities for the betterment of all. As one of our famous sayings states: "Merry meet, merry part. And merry meet again" and this should include everyone in the world, be they Christian, Jew, Muslim, or Pagan.

This is actually a blog I wrote on myspace a few weeks back and figured this would be a good starting blog. So yeah, enjoy...

Today was a good day, we had class which was a good time. And like usual of course we had a visualization afterwards which turned out pretty well. I talked to a couple spirits, one of which looked like a zombie, the other was one that lives in this house. Which I come to find out I was talking to him this morning around 5 or 6am when I was still between sleep and awakening. That turned out pretty well, I found out some things I've been waiting to hear for awhile now. So I was happy about that.

Later on that day another student came over to do something with my teacher that needed to be done, taking this as an opportunity to do something else I've been wanting to do I meditated again. I will not go into the details as it is a very personal subject, but after a long trip into the Underworld and a meeting with Anubis and an unnamed Goddess of the Underworld all was accomplished.

I suppose I will take some time here to discuss some misconseptions many people have, or at least my views on the subject of... DEATH! Now, this is a subject of great interest to me, and has been for quite some time. My views on the subject have evolved over the years as they tend to do. Now, many people fear death, as is normal in humans as many of us are afraid of what is to come afterwards and of course we are afraid of leaving our loved ones behind, leaving things unfinished, etc etc etc as the list goes on to uncountable reasons. Now, I will not say that this fear is unjustified or unnessisary, but what many people are afraid of is, in my opinion, most likely not there. So here is the point where I explain my views on death, but by no means am I stating that this is absolutely what it is, just how I view it...

Death, as many of us know, is a continuation of our existance but a very different one. Now, there are a few discrepancies among those in the pagan faith as we read the books, many of the Gods and Goddesses are titled as Lord/Lady of the Underworld, however we also hear of a place called Summerland where the soul goes to rest and learn a little more before being reincarnated. So, once one thinks about it, we have two places we're told we go after we die. Many people belive that when a soul dies it is almost immediately reincarnated as soon as a fertile egg is produced. Others belive that the soul ascends into the Summerland before being reincarnated. Both of these can be a true statement as I am no expert who's traveled to the other side and experienced it, at least not in this conciousness. But, as I have come to understand it once a person dies they are brought to the gates of the Underworld (as long as that soul is willing as we know sometimes they tend to stick around). There the soul is sat to rest and review it's previous life, going over it's high points and low points, it's good deeds and bad. Did it accomplish it's goal in life? Or did it "fail"? As the soul views this over and over, learning every moment of it's stay in the "plane". After the soul has learned as much as it can from viewing this and has indeed "repayed" or "repented", for lack of a better word on my part, it is allowed to ascend into the plane we refer to as the Summerland, a place of eternal summer where it may rest, and continue to learn as it wishes. Having never viewed this plane I cannot comment on it further. It is here that souls may commune with the living if they still wish, or if the living with to speak with them. This is not to say as a soul may not "speak" with the living in the Underworld, but as it is still dealing with it's previous life there things may come off as confusing to say the least. Once a soul has reached the Summerland it may stay as long as it wishes, or it may choose to be reborn again. This I would hope is the goal of every soul as our point in life is to become closer to Divinity as possible and the hardships of life are the best way to go about it. Now, there may be further planes to ascend to, but again not being an expert in any way and having never seen further than the Underworld I feel it is not right for me to comment on this. Now, to a few of you this may seem a familiar subject as it has been written of in one of my favorite books, but in further detail. It was something I read a while back but had not formed an opinion on it as I had no experience in the subject but after experiencing a little of it myself I have come to the conclusion that many of the subjects he covered had substance to them.

Again, I would like to make it clear that this is in no way what I feel is exactly perfect, this is my view on the subject and is clearly open to all interpretations and comments from others on their view. I do not claim to have spoken with any spirt on the subject and will most likely not anytime soon, as the best part of life is the mystery of what is to come. This is in no way an essay to say that we have nothing to worry about after one dies and there is always more to come so one should do whatever they wish. Life is an experience, an opportunity given to every mortal by the Divine to learn as much as possible, to experience all the good in life that they will. All I would like to stress on people is that life is to be just that, lived. Fear is an emotion to be overcome with time. Myself I have many fears, snakes, spiders, heights, just to name a few. However as a person who wants to overcome these things I should hope that one day these fears may be removed from my mine. I find it an amazing that we may jump out of planes and fall safely to the ground and I understand it's one of the most exhilirating experiences a person can have. I too would like to experience this, but there is work for me to do before I can accomplish it. So if there was one last thing I would like to say to you reader it is this: Fear is something that is holding you back from some of the experiences in life that you may actually enjoy more than you realize. Do your best to overcome them and experience all that you are missing (within reason of course, if you're afraid of robbing a bank then that's probably something you shouldn't act on) and enjoy life, one can not learn much of anything about life if you're too afraid to go out and do anything.